Here’s what I heard about Charisma

I’ve spent the past several days with a lot of people.  Visiting with my clients take me to many wonderful places.  Some people might say I’ve had an overload of people interaction, but I love it.  I always use a side angle or hidden agenda to keep my energy up.  These past two weeks my little side study was to learn what people think about Charisma.

I quickly learned how dangerous “trying to be” Charismatic can be.  When people try to be Charismatic, they tend to come off as a bit bizarre and lose trust of others.  Some people who are mistaken about natural Charisma find they push themselves too hard and actually become offensive.  One person joined toastmasters thinking he could acquire more Charisma and be a better Leader.  While he did hone his speaking skills, he looked like an amateur comedian trying out a new act.  One person was just like Bobby in the movie - Saturday Night Fever.  He thought if he would mimic someone who was drawing the crowds, he too could be Charismatic.  I watched a manager trying to please everyone.  Of course when she found out that it’s not only impossible, but career threatening, she realized she could not demand people see her Charisma.

What I did find, is that there are many people who are authentically Charismatic.  They’ve got it, and they continue to develop the skills they possess.  They seemed relaxed, confident, in control of their emotions, and use great body language.   But when they speak...that is the key - “When they speak”.  People with Charisma think before they put their mouth in motion.  People with Charisma are active listeners.  And when they do finally speak, the have commanded a waiting audience and they speak with a confident, controlled conviction.  

I found one other important observation of people with Charisma.  They follow the “golden rule”.  They typically treat other people the way they would have wanted to be treated.  You know...that rule still works.

Take a few days and purposefully observe people.  

1. Who do you see that does not have Charisma? Why?
2. Who do you see that has Charisma?  Why?

Tell me what you see, and what you’ve learned.

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